Crabs and Triggerfish
by escapethenoodles
Summary: 15 year old Karkat Vantas never got along with his older brother, Kankri. Or his parents. Or anyone, really. But when his brother falls into a coma, why does someone familiar start pestering him? And what are these strange memories that keep popping into his head? AU humanstuck.
1. Crabs and Triggerfish

**Andrew Hussie does not belong to me, therefore neither does Homestuck. **

**I'm going to have quite a bit of fun with this \(^_^)/**

**This may be a fairly long one and I'll try to update as frequently as possible with my busy schedule!**

**Please leave a review if you like it! :B**

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Karkat tiptoed out of the hospital dorm. He had to get to his brother's dorm. He glanced around himself. To his left was a map of the hospital. Karkat sniggered at the convenience of his escape and made a mental note of his room number. 413. He slowly trudged through the sickeningly white corridor. He heard a laugh ahead of him. "... fuck..." He picked up his pace until it turned into a silent jog. Suddenly, he tripped over a small box wedged into the wall to his right. It was a white machine laden with buttons and switches and screens and metres. It reeked of trouble. Karkat, however, was a very reckless teenager. Despite the previous consequences of his recklessness, he just never seemed to learn. Karkat swooped down to pick up the box and took a sharp turn.

Further up the hall, Karkat could hear a muffled voice. He walked up beside a closed door.

"Baby that would take away everything..."

He inched closer.

"And tell me now... HOW DO I LIVE WITHOUT YOU?!"

Karkat stifled a chuckle.

"I want to know, HOW DO I BREATHE WITHOUT YOU?!"

He almost giggled. Almost.

"How do I EVER! EVER SURVIVE?!"

That was it. He couldn't hold it in any longer.

"OOOOOOOHHHH!"

He almost fell to the floor in a heap of giggles.

"PFT... HAHAHA! WHAT THE EVERLASTING FUCK WAS THAT HAHAHAHA!

Suddenly, Karkat saw a shadow start to approach him through the stained glass window in the door.

"Oh fuck." He swore, and stumbled off in between giggles. A stitch had formed in his lower chest.

"Just what I needed," He thought to himself.

He was standing opposite to his initial point. In front of room 413. He decided to leave his 'adventure' until another day. For now, he just wanted to examine this mysterious box. He entered, closed the door and put up the 'DO NOT DISTURB' sign.

Karkat's fingers hovered above each button, each switch, each meter. This small box was more of a puzzle than a Rubik's cube. He placed the tip of his finger on a button that closely resembled a start sign. But instead of a circle and a line intersecting it, there was an ornate flower designed on the button. Karkat's curiosity grew by the millisecond. If his parents were here, they'd probably tell him to leave it alone, to 'fuck off back to his own room' or to 'finish the fucking homework that the shitty school they were generous enough to pay for gave him.' That was the most considerate they could get.

Karkat felt a strange piercing feeling in his chest. He winced. His parents may not have cared enough to check on him in hospital, but they sure had plenty of time for his brother, Kankri. Kankri was an all rounder. It's why he got so much attention. He never failed a test, never raised his voice and always scored first place in everything he set his mind to. His only fault would have been that he was rather long winded. The pain in Karkat's chest fluctuated between a stinging rage and a silent throbbing. But ever since his brother had an unfortunate accident, Karkat's parents just increased their resent. They blamed Karkat for trying to murder his own brother. This, of course was a hard thing to live with. Karkat's parents made him suffer every moment of his life. Some days he would return to his room with a broken heart, and others he would just have a broken nose. Whoever said " Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me." must have had an amazing life.

But no one was there to stop him this time. His parents had nothing to say to him now. He was free. Free from the taunts of his friends and family. Free from the abuse. Free from everything. He pressed the button. A keyboard popped up.

**triggeringOrator began pestering carcinoGeneticist**

TO: Karkat.

CG: ...

TO: KARKAT.

CG: ... WHAT?

TO: Well, I simply wanted t9 n9tify y9u that y9u are n9t l9sing y9ur sanity. I kn9w very well that y9u were at 9ne p9int c9ntemplating the p9ssi6ility that y9u may have actually g9ne, ahem, mad 9r the like, 6ut y9u may safely discard that idea fr9m y9ur 6rain. Alth9ugh I may n9t assure y9u that y9u are much t99 intellectual t9 c9nf9rm t9 such a state 9f - 9h! Excuse me! I d9 h9pe that the t9pic I had just menti9ned was n9t t99 sensitive an area t9 talk a69ut f9r y9u. Y9u must remind pe9ple a69ut these triggers 6ef9re beginning a c9nversati9n! 9n that n9te, may I add that every9ne has different triggers, which may 6e influenced 6y likes and dislikes, age, past relati9nships, peers, childh99d events, sentimentality, familial issues... present state 9f mind, recent deaths... c9mm9n disa6ilities... Many pe9ple fail t9 educate themselves a69ut these triggers, this is 9ften a key cause t9... And 9nce again, many 9f these triggers may include pers9nal hygiene, the discl9sure 9f secrets, the dispersal 9f a family... And finally, the mental health 9f a teenage 6eing. Feel free t9 ask any questi9ns at any time, 6r9ther.

CG: ...

TO: N9 questi9ns? W9nderful. Y9u understand. If you feel the slightest 6it c9nfused 6y any 9f this, y9u may ask me. 9f c9urse, this is 6ecause I am y9ur br9ther and I l9ve y9u. Even m9re, now that y9u n9w have the p9wer to c9mmunicate with me and respect the fact that I have 6ut a few w9rds t9 share -

CG: SHUT YOUR FUCKING CAKE HOLE UP YOU INSUFFERABLE CHRISTMAS JUMPER CLAD PRICK

TO: That was quite rude, Karkat, y9u mustn't use such vile language. Language such as this is 9ften c9nsidered a trigger, particularly t9 y9ung children and many 9f the elderly. Swearing must 6e tagged as a trigger in fr9nt 9f such a cr9wd, 9therwise it may lead t9 s9me disastr9us situati9ns. Speaking 9f disastr9us situati9ns, di -

CG: WHAT THE FUCK, KANKRI?

CG: WHY IN ALL FUCKING HEAVEN AND HELL ARE YOU HERE?

CG: YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE FUCKING DEAD BY NOW

TO: ...

TO: St9p interrupting! I just wanted t9 -

TC: hOnK :o)

TC: HeY bEsT fRiEnD

CG: GAMZEE

CG: HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET IN HERE

TC: I dIdNt MeAn No MoThErFuCkEr To GeT hIs FrEaK oN

TC: SoLbRo JuSt GaVe A mOtHeRfUcKeR yOuR tRoLlHaNdLe

TO: N9w n9w, y9ung acquaintance, I w9uld like t9 advise y9u t9 tag any p9ssi6le triggers with the p9tential t9 69ther my si6ling. It seems that y9u may have 6reached a certain line with my y9unger br9ther.

CG: OH MY FUCKING GOG.

TO: Tags, Karkat. #swearing #p9ssi6letriggers #tags #death

**carcinoGeneticist ceased pestering triggeringOrator**

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**Um... The sun is rising now...**

**I think that's enough for the night *_***

**Look forward to the next chapter! :D**


	2. What Happened?

**I've been rather busy recently, but I've decided that I'll try my best to get a chapter out every week! Wish me luck! XD**

**Apologies to everyone who doesn't like the Karkat and Cronus shipping - I find it immensely adorable, even though Cronus is a desperate, brainless 455)-(013. ;D**

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Kankri looked to his new friend.

Cronus Ampora was the polar opposite of Kankri Vantas. While Kankri wore wooly red jumpers, Cronus wore white stained wifebeaters. While Kankri hated socialising unnecessarily, Cronus was a hopeless flirt. While Kankri had perfect grammar at all times, Cronus cut most of his words short and had a strange speech impediment. He also seemed to be mentally stuck in the 1950's.

He had a bit of a thing for fish puns, even though he hated them. His little brother, Eridan must have rubbed off on him, despite the fact that Eridan hated them too! Eridan's friend, Feferi Peixes visited their house often and it felt like she was already part of the family. That's one reason Cronus never seemed to hit on her. The second was that Eridan would _kill_ him if he even tried. Eridan had a huge crush on Feferi, and even though she noticed it (Well, _probably_ noticed it, as Eridan practically threw himself at her whenever she was around), she blew him off as if he wasn't worth the effort. Cronus thought that under that bubbly exterior, she was a cold hearted, spoiled little girl. Finally, the elder Ampora was interested in someone else entirely. And that someone else was busy giving a speech at the time.

"Ampora, I highly doubt we are travelling in the right direction. Do you really know the correct route to the occasion? I was not informed that it would take place outside the city premises. I wouldn't have been going if it were not for Porrim and her motherly tantrums. I don't even understand why she treats me as if I were her son. We are certainly not related and she is only two years ol-mmph..." He was cut off as a large finger muffled the sound of his voice. He shivered at the many cold rings pressed against his lips.

"Hold your seahorses, little triggerfish. Wve'vwe got 'Tuna and 'Tula wvith us too, right? Can't be wvrong..." Assured the 1950's Greaser.

He stretched an arm over Kankri's shoulders which he quickly batted away. This earned a deep chuckle from Cronus. Cronus settled with placing his hand down gently on Kankri's while the other remained on the steering wheel. Kankri flinched but didn't take back his hand. The colour of his face slowly turned that of his bright red jumper as he looked away. Even though he claimed to be a celibate, he didn't do a great job at it. Cronus looked into his rear view mirror and caught a glance of Latula giggling and flashing him a thumbs up. He grinned victoriously. But out of the corner of his eye, he saw a small light.

"What the... What in the name of Cod is that?" Muttered Cronus, his voice a whisper. Kankri noticed that he hadn't used his impediment. It was strangely unsettling.

Kankri turned. A bright light was headed in their direction. It seemed as if you would be blinded if you stared at it for too long. It was accompanied by a loud honking noise. Kankri recognised the horn to be the same one the local train used. But the light empowered the noise completely. And it was getting brighter by the millisecond. The car screeched to a halt. The 19 year-old's eyes flickered. He realised what it was too late.

"Everyone out! NOW!" He screamed, his gelled purple locks falling out of place. He hopped and staggered out of the side of the hoodless vehicle and off the railway. Latula, with Cronus's help, stumbled out next. They both tried to pull Mituna out. Cronus's deep blue eyes widened.

_"Kankri!"_

Kankri, however, couldn't move. He couldn't speak (for once!). He could only watch as the light in front of him got taller and wider right before his eyes. He was momentarily blinded, submerged in a sea of light. He hastily shut his eyes tight closed. He didn't want to keep them open as he died. Kankri had seen many people die in front of him and their eyes were almost always wide open. It didn't look very comfortable, having your eyes open for all of eternity. Kankri always felt it was his responsibility to close their eyes for them, seeing as he killed them in the first place... So Kankri waited. And waited. He was afraid to open his eyes. He was afraid to know what all those cold, unseeing eyes had seen, had felt. Kankri sung quietly to himself to take his mind off that topic.

_Love of mine, Someday you will die, but I'll be close behind..._

Kankri remembered the lyrics of the song. It was the song he used to sing to Karkat when he was still a little child. Kankri would close the door and sing the song as a lullaby before he went to sleep.

_I'll follow you into the dark..._

Kankri remembered the times when his innocent little brother would fall asleep, but instead of leaving the room, Kankri would curl up next to him, blocking his ears from the screaming and the crying in the room next door and muffling his own quiet sobbing in his brother's soft, light hair. But he was stronger now. And his brother had also grown up. He didn't need him anymore.

"Kankri!" A loud noise startled Kankri's eyes wide open. He was certain he had heard his name. Kankri hesitantly glanced around himself, taking in the scene before him. But there was no scene. Only a white nothingness surrounding him. He wondered what he was sitting on. Better not to think about it.

"H-hello?" He tested. "I would like to inquire as to where I am and... what I am supposed to be doing here... Also, I'd like to ask if anyone is actually listening... to me...?"

Silence.

"Uh... Cronus? M-Mituna? Latula? I... Um..." Kankri was getting a bit uncomfortable. He wasn't used to staying silent for long periods of time. He tended to silence others around him. He got interrupted quite often though. Recently he had found a new friend, Cronus. He liked Cronus. He liked him because he would listen to Kankri while he was speaking. Sometimes he was even interested. Kankri let a small smile escape his lips. Hardly anyone was ever interested in his conversations. And Kankri thought it was only fair that he listened to Cronus too. But he would only get to listen to him if he ever saw him again... And the odds of that happening seemed quite low. The smile disappeared from his face.

It was fair to say that Kankri was feeling rather triggered right now.

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**I am SO sorry for my crappy fish puns.**

**Also, the song was I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Death Cab for Cutie**


	3. The Boy in the Blue Sock

**I've got all these weird ideas for this story, but I know I'll get myself into trouble if I actually use any of them! Ugh... **

**But heeeeeeres the update! Ta da!**

**John is finally making his first, proper appearance, whoop! :D**

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_*Knock knock*_

Karkat jumped and the strange box he was examining fell out of his grip. Luckily, it fell below the bed. Whoever it was had obviously decided to ignore his DO NOT DISTURB sign. They'd better be worth it.

"COME IN!" He said, running a sweaty hand through his dark, disheveled hair.

The door opened and a tall girl entered, dressed in bright green pj's with white puppies and night black hair in an infinitely worse condition than Karkat's own. Her eyes lived up to her name. They sparkled as they settled on Karkat. Her hair jutted out in all directions, and Karkat couldn't help but find it utterly adorable. He obviously couldn't tell her that, though.

Jade strolled in like it was her own house. She scanned the room to make sure Karkat hadn't broken anything in an angry fit again. It happened once. He broke his nose. Her jade green eyes darted to something square under the bed and she smiled.

"W-what's up Jade?" He huffed, ultimately failing to keep the nervousness out of his voice.

"Heehee!" She giggled, and jumped onto his bed, almost knocking him over. Karkat, who was obviously uncomfortable, became even more so.

"Hey!" He exclaimed.

"Hey yourself!" She retorted.

"You need to stop intruding my personal space!"

"Why, we're friends, aren't we?"

"B-but... I..." He started to tremble.

"O-oh..." She got off the bed. "Sorry... I forgot..."

They both looked away from each other awkwardly.

Karkat had a mild case of Haphephobia, or Chiraptophobia. A phobia of touch. It was why he was in hospital, just like his brother. His brother was admitted into the hospital two months ago, because of a train accident. He was in a coma, but had no fatal injuries. The doctors said it was very lucky for him to survive since he would have died if not for his close friend. But ever since Kankri fell in a coma, Karkat's parents grew even more violent. They blamed Karkat for causing Kankri to be in pain. A while after that, Karkat grew a phobia. He would wake up several times every night either screaming or crying, only to wake his parents up and suffer even more. He was put into hospital, but he only stayed there because he refused to tell the doctors or anyone else what happened in his past. If he told them what was wrong, he would be sent back home to his _'loving parents.'_ Of course, his parents denied all accusations of being being abusive to either of their sons. Kankri's friend, "CRONUS," corrected Karkat, threw himself between Kankri and the train. The doctors said he didn't make it. Cronus sacrificed himself for Kankri. Karkat wondered if Kankri would be willing to sacrifice himself for Cronus. "PROBABLY NOT," he thought. "HE WOULDN'T SACRIFICE HIMSELF FOR HIS OWN BROTHER, FORGET SOME RANDOM GUY."

Karkat started to wonder if he would sacrifice himself for Kankri. But his train of thought was interrupted by a high voice calling his name.

"EARTH TO KAAAAARKITTTTYYYYY!" Groaned Jade, rolling her eyeballs.

"WHAT? WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU HERE?"

"Heehee, _there's_ the Karkat I know and love!" Jade smiled. Karkat tried his best to prevent a candy red blush from emerging onto his face.

"Have you been working on anything recently? The clown said something about a translation device..."

"Uh, no. That's Equius's brother. Apparently it's not working out so well. But I'm taking a break for a while! No work for me! Heehee..." She giggled

Jade liked to work on projects every once in a while. She called them her "Little Science Experiments" but everyone knew they were more than just that. She provided enough money for herself and her younger brother AND their daily living expenses. Karkat found it pretty impressive. He hoped he could do that someday, stand up on his own two feet, the world below him. He would be a leader. But Jade was only a few months older than him and she had already gotten so far. It was a little discouraging, to be honest.

"I wanted to tell you something." She continued. Her thin, round black glasses threatened to fall off her nose. She polished the rim and pushed them back up with the tip of her finger. Karkat swallowed. He knew this wouldn't be good.

"It's just that-"

_*Tap tap tap*_

She was cut off by the sound of light knocking on the door.

"WHO IS IT?" Asked Karkat in irritation.

"..." No one replied. But they continued to knock.

_*Tap tap tap*_

Both Karkat and Jade groaned. "WHO THE _FUCK_ IS IT?!" They shouted in unison.

"..."

_*Tap tap tap*_

Karkat was about to get up and walk to the door himself when Jade jumped up stopped him.

"No, stay, I think I know who it is."

Karkat obediently sat back down.

Jade threw the door wide open, letting a cold breeze through the room. Karkat shivered.

"Hi John!"

"..."

"I'm sorry! I didn't realise you were still waiting!"

"..."

Karkat was confused. He couldn't see past Jade and he couldn't hear anyone talking back to her either. "I WONDER IF SHE'S FINALLY GONE MAD," He sniggered. It was then that he noticed a long blue... Windsock (?) behind Jade.

"HEY JADE? I THINK YOU SHOULD STOP TALKING TO A GIANT SOCK..."

Jade looked back at Karkat and gave him a disapproving look. She stepped back and Karkat still looked at a blue windsock. Until it grew arms and pulled its hood down. It was a boy. He was wearing blue PJ's just like Jade. He looked like a little child who had just gotten up from bed since he sported a messy bed head and had a goofy grin plastered onto his face. He wore splintered, thick framed glasses which hid his... Strange... blue eyes. Karkat summed up that he was a total dork.

John's eyes looked straight at Karkat, much to his discomfort. His eyes were blue, a deep, dark, blue. But saying his eyes were blue was like saying the sun was yellow. It didn't capture the burning. They were a storm. A whirlpool sucking him in. Looking into his eyes, Karkat could feel the waves, hear them crashing against each other. He could see excitement buzzing around behind them. They looked almost... Electric. Karkat felt the need to look away, but he couldn't. No matter how much he wanted to, he just couldn't. It was like the eyes were searching through his own, they could read his every emotion, his every secret. It was like the eyes were trying to tell him something, something the boy couldn't say. And the dry line of tears running down his cheeks only encouraged the idea.

"He's not a sock, Karkat, he's my _brother_. And he can't speak."

* * *

**I still ended up using an idea which will get me into trouble. Great.**


	4. The Demons Inside

**AAH! IMSOSORRYFORTHELATEUDATE! I was on holidays so I was kinda busy :o**

**But what day to update is better than your own birthday? Heehee :D I got a HUUUUUGE Totoro teddy bear :3**

**Cronkri is adorabubble xD**

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~Day 2~

Kankri jolted awake. Awake? No. That was phrased wrong.

_Alive_.

He was having a nightmare. He dreamt of the train hitting him, his body hitting the left side of the track like a rag doll. He took a deep breath. Dying felt horrible. It was like he couldn't breathe. Like he was underwater. But he'd woken up from one nightmare and landed into another.

_When your dreams all fail_  
_And the ones we hail_  
_Are the worst of all_  
_And the blood's run stale_

Kankri stopped and squinted. It felt as if the white light around him was getting brighter. He would love a pair of sunglasses right now...

"Anyone there?" He tested."Th-This isn't very funny... You can stop now... In fact, it is increasingly triggering..."

Kankri had a feeling no one was listening.

~Day 4~

Kankri lay sprawled across the nonexistent ground and closed his eyes. It helped stop the light from getting in. He swore he must have been looking directly at the sun all this time. Luckily his eyes were not as sensitive as his brother. But they both wore tinted contact lenses. The lenses reduced the impact of light on their monstrous red eyes. Their demonic, ugly, monstrous red eyes.

_When you feel my heat_  
_Look into my eyes_  
_It's where my demons hide_  
_It's where my demons hide_

Kankri felt bored. He didn't feel tired or anything, just bored. Kankri didn't feel boredom very often. He didn't like it.

Letting out a long groan, he rolled onto his side. He wondered if this was punishment for all the bad things he'd done. Instead of just letting him go to hell, he was being punished for the people he had let die. The people he had killed.

Terezi would laugh.

~Day 7~

The silence was deafening. He finally understood the meaning to that saying. Kankri wondered how long he'd been here. He was used to silencing others with his speeches, but not like this. At least he knew someone was listening. A while ago, he thought he had heard something. A familiar _Honk._ It was ridiculous. He was probably deluding himself... Anyway, people might not pay attention, but at least they _listen_. Kankri preferred talking to thinking. Or waiting. But he decided he would wait. Wait until someone found him - or at least notice he was gone.

_I can't escape this now_  
_Unless you show me how..._

~Day 11~

Kankri didn't have the strength to speak anymore.

That was a lie.

He felt like he had the strength to do anything, everything. But he didn't have anything to do. He found it fuddling that he had so much energy when he hadn't eaten in almost - he checked his watch - two whole weeks.

Kankri had noticed something in the past few days. He couldn't tell if the room was hot or cold. It was strangely numbing. Also, even though he didn't have food to eat, somehow he didn't feel the need to. He didn't question it. Sure, something to eat would be nice, but only because he wanted something to do, something to see, smell, hear, taste, touch.

_Touch..._

Kankri's face lit up like the room around him at the thought of Cronus. His incapability of sensing when he'd intruded someone's personal space. The various times he'd gotten beaten up over it. He was like a child. He never learned... And also the time when-

... Wait a minute.

If it was possible, Kankri's face would have been a lightbulb. He put his head in his hands.

What?

He was _not_ just thinking about Cronus.

Nopenopenopenopenope.

_Nope._

...

He wanted to see him.

But more than Cronus, he wanted to see his little brother, Karkat. He wondered how Karkat was faring without him. Kankri knew that Karkat was put under pressure. It used to be because of his eyes. But one day Kankri came home from school and found Karkat curled up on the ground, just staring at the wall across from him. He had dry tears on his cheeks. Kankri asked what was wrong but Karkat wouldn't budge. His mother and father had gone out. And of course his parents wouldn't help, even if he told them. They were disgusting. Kankri used to think Karkat was just bullied, just like the other kids, and that he'd grow out of it. He was wrong.

He realised this ever since he saw his father pin Karkat to the wall. Ever since his mother scarred his poor little brother across the chest with her kitchen knife... He could feel how tense his brother was, how his tiny body was shaking. He was like a flower that had been stepped on, shivering in the wind. Kankri grew worried. So he seated his younger brother on his lap and wrapped his skinny arms around him, laid his shivering head against his chest and placed his own above his black feathery head. He was casting a shield around him, protecting him from the world. But he couldn't protect him from his own thoughts, his own memories...

_I wanna hide the truth_  
_I wanna shelter you_  
_But with the beast inside_  
_There's nowhere we can hide_

He didn't know what else to do. He didn't know why it was happening. From that day on, Kankri tried his best to look out for Karkat and offered to talk whenever he was feeling down. But Karkat refused every time. It was like he didn't want Kankri to know something. He grew cold, bitter and distant from him. And Kankri didn't know why_._

He didn't even know _why._

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**The song for this was Demons by Imagine Dragons :D**

**Also, I have most of the next chapter written so hopefully it'll be up soon!**


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